Friday, February 15, 2008

Singles V/s Sarcastic Society

"What are your plans for v-day?" "So what did you do on v-day?". These are the questions that most singles dread in the month of Feb. It’s not only the questions but also the way they are asked. Singles are made to feel they are leading a pathetic life. They make you feel you as if you are the most degraded species in the universe. Given a chance most singles would like to get invisible during Feb.

Normally when asked what i did on v-day i have a ready made answer.

"I couldnot celebrate as my ex eloped with my current gf". And i get delighted watching the confused expression on morons and shock on anybody who has a brain about the size of proton. If you have not understood what i mean by last line then you deserve to be single.

Being single is taken as a sign that you are worthless in the society. Ok. Agreed. I might be exaggerating things here but lot of people have misconceptions about singles.

"Your weekends must be quite boring."
" ...anyways you dont have anything to do on holidays.."

These are just the few comments that we hear quite often. And more often than not these words come in two different undertones. One of pity and the other sarcastic. One of my friend got so annoyed with this that he decided to stage a revolt. He collected all the singles he could find and went on to create a all singles club. One of the first rules of the club was

"we shall treat our fellow members of the club as our brothers and sisters"

No surprise then that club has just one member.

Its high time all the singles get united and lodge a PIL. No pub or restaurant should any more have "only couples" board. Its like "indians and dogs not allowed" tags of british. By the way no dog is ever single.

Lots of singles club fail for just one reason. Ek haddi hazar kutte. A single female is enough to bring down the singles club. And we can not even have all male singles club. Chances are those gay clubs in brazil will take over the club.

Damn it. We cant even form a club. Singles are really the most discriminated.

"Oh! you are single..." They say as if being single means you are walking example of mixing Cancer,TB,Aids,polio and god knows what disease.

Let me assure you that being single is not a sin. Its the sane decision and perfect one. That is until you find someone and then you can also use those sarcastic remarks against your unfortunate still single friends.

Being single saves you from so many troubles. You wont have to worry about your bike being taken away from those bank guys. Nor will you have to keep on changing your address for every new credit card.

Being single gives you the freedom to flirt with hell lot of girls. And also no need to switch off your cell when you and your friends plan for a all night boozing party secretly. You dont have to worry about being treated as a driver.

No more " Honey can you drop me to office today...". You are at peace with yourself when you are single. When you are with your GF you are at peace with her smile and at war with her shopping list.

Okay. All the good things about being single. Dont worry about people passing comments about you (you know they are right). They are just jealous about your golden days. Ignore them.

No matter how upset you are with being a single take consolation in believing you are lucky. Dont worry about facts.

And pray next time when i write about v-day i am on the other side of being single.

NOTE: I am dedicating this blog to a very good friend of mine who, in her own words, "instigated" me to write this blog.


stuti said...

One thing that comes to my mind is after reading this is... grapes are sour ;)

Aham Brahmasmi said...

Another example of scarcastic remarks :D