Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Love or Life?

Love or Life?

A friend of mine asked me - "Love or Life?". Well, actually the answer depends on the person who is raising this question. Often, this question is asked by people who have been "victims" of cupids evil play. These people are either waiting for someone to accept their love for long or have chosen to just live in the state of denial. Often the obsession with their love interest takes the form of aggressive and violent behavior. Some resort to abusing, threatening and various other means to cause hurt.

By doing this they fail to understand that it only leads to rejection and nothing more. They think that the other person deserves same hurt that they have gone through. They blame the other person for their unhappiness. They even go to the extent of ruining the life of someone they believe they love.

Yes. They just "believe" they are in love. They are not. Love can only make you happy and compassionate. Love can never ever make you harm somebody. Not at all the one you claim to love. Its not love. Its just obsession.

Love is when you feel happy about the person you love. Love is when you understand and give freedom to your loved one to have his/her decision. Love is when you respect other persons feelings and oblige. Just because the other person does not reciprocate your love, you cant blame him/her. If you are not happy, its because you chose to be unhappy. Life becomes more beautiful if you can accept each person has his/her own likings and they cannot always comply with yours. You can only love a person. You cant force a person to love you. And that is what exactly most people do.

You don’t cause harm or hurt to a person you love no matter how much pain you have to go through. If you do that, then its not love but only a selfish obsession.

People fail to see this simple truth. They get so obsessed with the idea of being rejected that they want to take revenge. How can anybody take revenge on someone they claim to love? Does the pain of your loved one make you happy? No. It can never.

Youth often ignore this very basic fact. They start plotting downfall of someone they loved. They deny their rejection. They get aggressive. They cause much mental trauma to the one who has chosen not to be loved by them. Its quite strange. By doing all this they think they can "win" over the other person. No sir. It only makes them hate you. Not even pity you. But these people unknowingly satisfy their ego with this hate.

Most importantly don’t forget that Love is just part of Life. Move on with your life. Don’t be stuck in the past. If the other person has chosen not to be loved by you, accept it. May be you have better things to come in your life. By being in past you only ignore the great moments that are coming by.

Often when in love people claim that they cant live without their loved one. Well fine. But when the other person has chose to move one without you, its the test of your strength. Lead life normally with out that person and show him/her that they did not deserve your life. That’s the way to be.

By constantly wasting your time in thinking about the gone one, by trying to plot to make him/her come back, by thinking of ways to cause hurt and pain all you achieve is your own downfall. You miss your life. You become a loser. You lose not only the person you loved, but also everything and everybody else. Your past starts ruining your present and future.

Please guys, learn to accept the truth. No one lives for anybody nor dies for anybody. If they do, it’s only when the other person deserves it. And the one who has rejected you really does not deserve your life nor your death. It won’t matter if you are happy or unhappy. You are not part of their life. Then where is the need for you to ruin your life for them? Don’t make someone your goal of life when they have forgotten that you had ever existed.

I say it again. Love is just part of Life.

Hope i have answered the question "Love or Life?".


Towsifa said...

wow Ram, i must say, this is one of the most mature and best writings of yours...2 Thumbs up to you !!
The last para is just perfect !! Out of which the best lines are -
'The one who has rejected you really does not deserve your life nor your death'
'Don’t make someone your goal of life when they have forgotten that you had ever existed'

This is very true and i hope each one of them understands the depth of these lines...

I would like to add one from my end - Life is lived just once, one should not waste it in hating someone; whatever one experiences in life (good/bad) has a reason; so, cherish the good ones and learn from the bad ones and discard them from your life !!
Life is beautiful !! Give a piece of your joy to others, spread happiness !!

Nithin.S said...

"Never swim, always float" that should be the mantra of life.